Forget the Baby Shower: Host a Gestation Celebration for the Cheeky Mommy-to-Be in Your Life! 

Just because the baby is precious doesn’t mean the party needs to be.

Written by Katiedid Langrock: a professional screenwriter, humor columnist, and author of the Baby Bump Bucket List series. 

Pregnancy is a profound, magical, and life-changing time. But it should also be fun! When I was pregnant with my first child, I was surprised by how miserable I felt. It was not just the morning sickness all day for all nine months (though that certainly didn’t help) but also the fact that suddenly my personhood was somehow removed from every conversation. I, a professional comedy writer, was expected to be soft and frilly and coo at the sight of booties.

But that’s not who I was, and that’s not how I felt. I wrote Baby Bump Bucket List, a humorous and lighthearted book, as a gift for moms-to-be so they don’t lose themselves while growing someone new. It’s filled with 40 weeks of outrageous fun, food, pranks, and pampering that you can only get away with while pregnant. Included in its pages is an outline for the raucous and irreverent baby bash my friends threw for me, which I will share with you here. If you’re looking for an antidote to the typical baby shower for a cheeky mommy-to-be, this could be the party for you!

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To Invite

Everyone! There is no need for this baby jubilee to be a girls-only gathering. A fetus fiesta is for anyone who likes a good time and a bit of naughty humor. Come one, come all to the incubation celebration! 

• ‍Pregnant AF invitations are a good way to let people know from the get-go that this ain’t your run-of-the-mill baby shower. 
• A music-themed invitation is another way of showing that the party will be hip without giving away the total irreverence of the party.

To Decorate

Let the décor be as outrageous as your activities. This is a party celebrating life! So let’s laugh and play and be a tad naughty. Being a tad naughty is what got the mommy-to-be here in the first place! 

• A “knocked up AF” balloon display is sure to bring giggles to the guests.
• ‍Sperm whale paper plates are a subtle (not so subtle?) nod to the swimmers who made this day possible. And paper plates, because no one wants to clean up when they’re pregnant. 
• A diaper throne—’cause Mama’s gotta sit. Plus, Mama is gonna need all those diapers, so it’s really the best gift-meets-décor possible.
• Use a diaper garland—or hang real diapers on a clothesline with clothespins.

To Eat

Keep the food easy and simple. Let the silly labels do the work for you. From a hot dog stand (with a naughty take on the buns) to black bean dip labeled “meconium” and a twist on the traditional king cake, your food can be as bananas as the rest of your baby bonanza. 

Stuffable hot dog buns labeled "How it started."

• Have baby-in-belly fruit salad and label it with “How it’s going.”
• Label the black bean dip as “meconium” and add some tortilla chips on the side. 
• Get “ready to pop” popcorn.
• Repurpose this recipe for king cake as queen cake. Change out purple and green sprinkles for pink and blue, but definitely keep the little plastic baby inside.
• Make sperm-shaped cookies.

To Drink

Think ease. You want to be able to enjoy the party, not be running a blender all day. A few glass dispensers and some silly labels are all you need. Don’t forget to provide both alcoholic versions (especially if you want folks participating in the games!) and nonalcoholic versions for our mamas-to-be and friends in solidarity. Just make sure your labels make clear which drinks are alcoholic and which are nonalcoholic.

Label the sangria as “amniotic fluid.”

• Get glass dispensers with labels.
• Label the margarita mocktail with “Uh-oh, my water broke!”
• You can also find 13 other mocktail recipes in my book Baby Bump Body Care.

To Play

Typical baby shower games—such as guessing who’s who among baby pictures and sticking candy bars in diapers—are fun times. But this type of fetus festival is meant for mamas who are looking for something a tad wilder.

Note: The active games, such as the water slide and three-legged race, are not meant for the mama-to-be to participate in, just the guests. Let’s keep that gestating gem safe!

• Take a boob piñata and fill the sucker with Milk Duds. Then give a swing at it!
• Dust off your old cornhole set from college and get some new sperm-shaped bean bags for a fun and naughty competition that shows the guests how it all really went down! Sorta. 
• Pretend you’re traveling through the birth canal with a long pink waterslide. (For extra points, you can build papier-mâché legs at the end of the water slide as my friends did—inspired by this scene in Patch Adams.)‍
• Decorate one another’s bellies. Who needs face painting when you’ve got belly painting? This is a great way to get the men at your party involved. Who doesn’t like a little friendly competition? Or…
• Fasten diapers around the ankles of your guests for a baby bash–themed three-legged race.‍
• Cards Against Pregnancy is a fun indoor game option for the guests who are just as messed up and hilarious as you and the mama-to-be are!

To Listen

When you’re celebrating a baby bump, you gotta keep the party bumpin’ with some nice beats. 

• “Baby Got Back,” by Sir Mix-a-Lot
• “Baby,” by Justin Bieber
• “…Baby One More Time,” by Britney Spears
• “Baby-Baby-Baby,” by TLC
• “All That She Wants,” by Ace of Base
• “Be My Baby,” by The Ronettes
• “Ice Ice Baby,” by Vanilla Ice

To Watch

For those who want a little quiet time away from the fetus festival or for when the party is winding down, it’s nice to have a television or outdoor screen playing some classics. 

• ‍Knocked Up ‍
• Three Men and a Baby ‍
• It’s Alive ‍
• Dirty Dancing—because “no one puts Baby in a corner.”

To Gift

Ultimately, a Baby Shower is about showering the parents-to-be with presents. This shower may be full of shenanigans, but ultimately, it’s no different. Buy your mama-friend a gift. 

• ‍Baby Bump Bucket List. If you thought this party idea was fun, get your buddy this book. It’s full of silly anecdotes and outrageous suggestions on what to do while pregnant. If nothing else, it’s great for a giggle during a time that can be beautiful but is often difficult. ‍
• Pregnancy shirts.
• Everything that’s on your friend’s baby registry. Just because your first-time parent friend is fun doesn’t mean they don’t desperately need a whole bunch of baby stuff. Be a good pal and show the mama-to-be you care with gifts that will actually help when they’re dealing with actual diaper blow-outs.

A baby shower should represent the person having the baby. Have fun! Be playful! Laugh and giggle and get a tad naughty! It’s gonna be a long while before your mama-to-be gets to have some silly fun again. Let’s make this a party to remember so Mama has something to smile about on those long nights ahead. Let the shower shenanigans begin!

About the author

I am a seasoned TV writer, screenwriter, published author, longtime syndicated humor columnist, adjunct professor, television development executive, story coach, and brand spankin' new podcaster. Shows I co-developed were nominated for an Emmy for Best Children's Series, multiple NAACP Image Awards, Webby Awards, and won the 2020 Diversity Media Award for Best Kids' Series. I recently published the Baby Bump Bucket List series—buy it now on Amazon! I look for joy and connection in all that I do.

Join her party: wildliterary.com

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