If hosting feels like one more thing on an already full plate, Abbie Romanul wants you to know this: you’re not doing it wrong—you’re just in a season that calls for simpler plans. As the founder of Raising the Bar (a monthly zero-proof cocktail kit designed to make great drinks easy), Abbie thinks about gatherings the same way many great hosts do: start with the people, keep the pressure low, and choose a few details that make the moment feel cared for.

Her current hosting era is casual, family-friendly, and intentionally unfussy (three young kids will do that). But it’s not “thrown together.” It’s thoughtful in a way that actually works—prep-ahead food, easy table upgrades, and a planning philosophy that prioritizes connection over perfection.

Hosting Q&A with Abbie Romanul 

Q: When planning a gathering at home, where do you start?

A: I always start with the occasion and the people: who’s gathering, and what are we gathering for? That kicks off the planning. We tend to be low-key hosts these days (three young kids mean simple is easiest and makes us more likely to host). I also try to choose things we can prep ahead of time so we can spend the most time enjoying our guests.

Q: What are your favorite ways to break the ice or entertain guests?

A: For my 40th birthday, we had a tarot card reader, which was such a blast. It was fun to see people light up around something a little unexpected. But in general, our gatherings are intimate and casual, so we don’t usually need formal icebreakers.

We do love a good game when we want to shift the energy. Telestrations has been a favorite for both adults and kids. This season of life is about simplicity.

Q: If you had a limited budget for a small dinner party, what would you focus on for the tablescape?

A: Fresh flowers, always. Bud vases are my favorite because they stretch a budget but still look intentional and elegant. Candles also add so much warmth.

For family-friendly meals, I love covering the table with a long roll of butcher paper and putting jam jars filled with crayons down the center. It’s fun for kids and grownups, and cleanup is easier.

Q: What makes a great gathering memorable?

A: The people. Food is high on my list, but the people matter most.

Q: What would you tell someone who feels overwhelmed about hosting friends at home?

A: Done is better than perfect. I’d always rather spend quality time with people I adore than worry about things not being “just so.” Sometimes that means pizza takeout and paper plates.

In our 20s and 30s, we loved throwing big dinner parties with themes and printed menus. There will be more time for that in the future. For now, we prioritize making time together happen over elaborate plans. Done is better than perfect.

Q: What’s your signature recipe (food or drink) to serve when hosting?

A: I know the peak charcuterie board moment has come and gone, but I always have one out. It’s perfect because if we’re behind on food prep, guests can nibble and chat with us in the kitchen while we finish up.

Q: What’s your go-to soundtrack for a dinner party?

A: I’m a Spotify girl. Depending on the mood, I’ll either make a playlist ahead of time or use the ‘radio’ feature for an artist I’m enjoying. I like that it gives a balance of familiar and new music to set the tone.

Q: What’s your favorite “party trick”?

A: My husband makes the best brown butter chocolate chip cookies. I love it when he makes a double batch so we can serve some after dinner and send guests home with some to enjoy later.

Q: What are your favorite products or brands to use when hosting?

A: I always love to have a recent Raising the Bar box on hand for zero-proof drinks. And this is super specific, but Seggiano’s balsamic fig glaze ends up in so many dishes. It’s an easy way to make things feel elegant and intentional without much extra effort.

Partytrick Take: Real Hosting Takeaways

Abbie’s style is a reminder that ‘low-key’ doesn’t mean last-minute or not special. It means making smart decisions that protect your energy so the gathering can actually feel good for you, too. If you’re in a busy season (kids, work, life), this is exactly the kind of hosting approach that keeps connection on the calendar.

How can I recreate this hosting style in a simple way?

Steal Abbie’s easiest formula: people-first + one intentional detail + prep-ahead food.

Try this for your next casual dinner (or even a pizza night):

• Decide the reason you’re gathering: a milestone, a new job, or ‘just because’ are all perfectly good reasons to gather friends and family.
• Choose one small upgrade: bud vases and candles or butcher paper and crayons.
• Put out something for guests to enjoy as they arrive: a snack board, chips + dip, or a quick appetizer. (Plus, this buys you a little extra time for last-minute tasks!)

If you want structure without overthinking it, use a simple checklist approach: what to prep ahead of time, what to set out, and what to do right before guests arrive. 

As an easy starting point, Partytrick’s planning resources, like a party checklist, can help you map out the basics without overcomplicating.

What is the most important planning decision behind this gathering?

The most important decision is Abbie’s first one: plan around your capacity, not your ideal fantasy version of hosting.

That single choice shapes everything:

• Menu: prep-ahead, low-maintenance, crowd-pleasing
• Timing: less day-of cooking, more time in the room
• Setup: quick table “signals” (flowers/candles) instead of elaborate styling
• Flow: snack board first, dinner second, cookies to end (and send home)

It’s not about lowering standards, but more about designing a gathering that supports connection and keeps the host relaxed.

What can hosts borrow from this approach for their own event?

Here are a few takeaways worth adopting immediately:

• Use “done is better than perfect” as your rule, not your pep talk. Build a plan that assumes you’ll be busy and tired (but you’re still looking forward to it). 
• Make one thing feel special. Fresh flowers, bud vases, candlelight, or a playful table covering can do more than an expensive tablescape.
• Plan a frictionless arrival. Have music on, a drink option ready (zero-proof counts), and something to nibble on so no one is hovering while you finish up.
• Send guests home with something small. Cookies in a napkin, a to-go slice of cake, or a “take one for later” moment make the night stick.

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Want more from Abbie Romanul? Explore Raising the Bar’s zero-proof cocktail kits at weareraisingthebar.com. Ready to host in a way that actually feels doable? Create a free Partytrick account for planning tools and playbooks that keep things simple.

Start here:

• Al Fresco Dinner Party
• Basic BBQ
• Boozy Brunch

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